I'll Never Let You Down Again
by Kazima Kuwabara
Summary: song fic. Yusuke, Hiei, and Kurama left Kuwabara behind, and he was killed. They now only have each other, but can Kurama and Hiei save Yusuke from himself?


I own nothing. As I write this I think of Suzanne Ice. She was in ROTC with me, not in my class, but somewhere in our company. She was hit by a car at a cross walk. She was 16, and killed November 28TH. She was crossing the cross walk for goodness sakes! On a serious not think of this: Treasure each moment. You just don't know how long you got.  
song is:  
Never Let You Down by Eagle-eye Cherry

1234

In a quiet room two figures sat next to something covered in a white sheet. It was still, stiff, and very long. The sheet was perfectly clean. Perfectly white, all but for one small dot on the sheet.

One tiny red dot.

In the other room loud sobbing could be heard. Horribly loud sobbing. Curses, the sound of breaking objects, and even the sounds of fists on walls, and floors could be heard. Even the owner of the fists turned them on himself.

"Why won't he stop"  
/If you don't smile again You will cry until the end/

Hiei closed his eyes at Kurama soft words. The first words he had spoken in an hour. Closing his eyes tight he tried to ignore the fact that Yusuke Urameshi was to one crying. Was the one making those horrible sounds.

Was hurting himself in the tiny room next door.

"DXmmit stay out of my head..." he whispered.

He was referring to this very moment. To the white sheet covering something that should be moving. To Kurama's wet cheeks. To this whole damX day.

This whole day.

A thought entered his head, of pale blue eyes suddenly growing paler.

"GET OUT OF THERE!"

/Cause I know where you're bound With the sorrow that brings you down/

Kurama watched Hiei hit himself in the head. "Hiei..." Kurama reached out for him, but Hiei shoved him off. "How dare he?!" Hiei snarled glaring at the sheet with the red dot. "How dare you make me this weak and pathetic. How dare you make me feel bad!? HOW DARE YOU!"

Hiei reached for the sheet, with the red dot.

That tiny red dot.

"HIEI DON'T!" Kurama cried, but it was too late.

Hiei ripped the sheet off, and his angry face melted away as he looked down at the thing on the floor. He still held the sheet, and with more care moved it aside, holding it near his head. He did not release it. Kurama starred down, his breath coming to a halt.

Kuwabara slept on the floor.

/So now I beg of you Tell me what I can do/

He slept there, peaceful. His lids closed, his shirt torn, his pants dirty, and some parts of his skin had caked mud all over it. His coppery curls was falling out of place and he obviously need more hair gel. If wind was blowing his hair would fall in soft curls. There was no sign of injury except for one thing.

His left nostril leaked blood.

Not even that much, the blood didn't even reach his lips.

That made the red dot.

"You bXstard...wake up...you stupid, ugly, pain in the aXs human! Open you fXcking eyes!!"

Kuwabara slept on.

The sobs in the room grew louder.

/To make you smile again Cause I let you down my friend/

Hiei covered him back up, and looked at the doorway. Kurama had already risen, and now stood by the door listening to the heart breaking sobs. "Hiei we should..." Kurama trailed off looking back at the short warrior. Hiei starred at the red dot and whispered, "Should what Kurama? Nothing we do will happen. The only one who can stop tears like :that: was killed today."

Kurama winced at the word and closed his eyes as memories came back.

/FLASHBACK/

"Hurry up! Hurry up!" Yusuke called back to Kuwabara who lagged behind the three demons. Yusuke shoved his annoyingly long hair away from his face. This guy they had to face had been strong. Yusuke had to go all out for him. Kurama and Hiei looked back, the shorted of the two snapping, "Keep up!" Kurama nodded and turned away.

As they ran the Rekai finally reached the gates to get them out of the demon's kingdom which now crumbled around them. Passing through the gates, and going an extra few feet, the three demons collapsed. "Oh...I can't go on!" Yusuke breathed. Hiei snored, "Weakling..."Kurama did not speak. He simply turned and waited for Kuwabara to catch up.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

After the first two minutes Yusuke and Hiei sat up.

After the next two minutes, they all looked out where Kuwabara should be.

After the next five minutes, Yusuke and Hiei were on their feet next to Kurama.

After the next 10 minutes, they all were back at the crumbling kingdom screaming Kuwabara's name.

Hiei was the first to spot him.

/Now you're on your own In a life with your best friend gone/

He called to Yusuke, and then Kurama. The three stood there. Kuwabara was in a net. Not a net or roped, or chains, but of glowing wire. His eyes were closed, and he was limp. They recognized this net. The demon they had faced, had set them up all over the house. These nets were living monsters.

They paralyzed you, and took your voice. After the first six minutes your grew cold...another 6 minutes you could barely breathe. 3 minutes later you were dead.

The three demons had come four minutes too late.

Every last bit of life, of energy had been sucked out of him.

They cut him down, and shook him. Hit him. Screamed. Slapped his face. Did everything and anything. Yusuke screamed at him crying, "YOU CAN'T BE DEAD!" He hit Kuwabara, and his head lolled to the side. A drop of blood feel from his nose.

Yusuke shook, his breaths picked up and he suddenly clutched his heart with one hand. Wild eyes danced all over Kuwabara, and then the youth took the lifeless man in his arms and held him. He screamed...and Kurama could remember no more.

/END OF FLASHBACK/

/And it ain't easy to be In a world of misery/

"Hiei..." The red eyed man looked at Kurama. Kurama dried his face. "Yusuke is our friend...he needs us...and now." Hiei starred at the white sheet. "Let not let this friend down." Hiei snapped to attention, and rose. He sighed, and admitted, "I don't know what to say to him...what did Kuwabara say to him?"

Kurama smiled, closing his eyes in a strange kind of peace. "Nothing." Hiei looked at Kurama. "Ku...Kuwa...He would talk to Yusuke about nothing. Talk about his poor grades, his honor code, us...he would talk about nothing of what was wrong...all the while rubbing his hand up and down his back until Yusuke broke down crying, and hugged him.

"Are you saying that is what we should do?"

Kurama looked at him, "No." Kurama smiled an eerie look in his eyes, "I'm saying that is what we shouldn't do. He needs us...not us mimicking Kuwabara." Kurama grabbed the door knob.

"He needs us."

/So now I beg of you Tell me what I can do/

Yusuke lay under the bed. How he got there he was certain. He was bleeding and his body ached. His fists were bruised and bleeding, and his eyes swollen from tears. He sat there gasping for breath, trying to get air into his chest.

He muttered curses towards himself, Kurama, Hiei, and even Kuwabara...Yusuke hated him now.

Hated that goofy smile that wouldn't go away.

Hated the silence that would emit from him when something was wrong.

Hated remembering the bitter tears Kuwabara had once sobbed for him.

Hated the teen that challenged him every day.

Hated the one who made him laugh, feel better about himself, and just stayed with him even when Yusuke was at his worse.

He hated Kuwabara for not being here to stop his tears.

"You moron..."

/To make you smile again Cause I let you down my friend/

Yusuke squeezed his eyes shut, and threw the bed off him smashing it into the wall. The room was all but destroyed, everything was ruined. The window broken. His blood on the walls and floor. Everything ripped, smashed, broken up.

But that wasn't enough.

He wanted his best friend who he'd let down.

He wanted to take away his last words. His last words he spoked to Kuwabara. "Hurry up! Hurry up!" If Yusuke had known that Kuwabara would be gone he wouldn't have said those things to him. He would have laughed with him one more time, and told him how he really felt for Kuwabara. What he really thought of him.  
/Your sorrow like rain comes down In the tears that you shed/

Respect.

That guy...that guy that would do anything to help a kitten. The guy that would let himself get beat up to help another, let himself die to help another. The guy who thought if you hit a woman you were disgusting. The only guy that actually ever respected them truly, even though most woman thought very little of him. The guy that thought there may be good in everyone, even if he didn't voice it himself.

Friendship.

Who was closer to him? Yusuke could remember Kuwabara since he was in diapers. They didn't know each other directly, but he'd seen him around. As Yusuke grew older and became a fighter, he watched as Kuwabara had done the same. He watched as their fights blossomed into a daily ritual. In fact Yusuke was actually worried when Kuwabara didn't show up for a fight. Somehow that twisted relationship evolved into something more. A strong friendship that couldn't be broken.

Love.

Kuwabara was his family. His brother. Yusuke could remember the time that he had gotten so sick he couldn't come to school for a month. Keiko was there ever day, and then one day, about two weeks into his sickness Kuwabara showed up. This was before the two were friends. Yusuke stood there, holding the door open, fevered eyes starring at him. Kuwabara didn't meet his eyes, but held out a bag and without a word, left. When Yusuke opened it and hour after starring at it, he found some tea, rose tea it was called. It tasted good. He found a book about a fighter, who died way back when saving his best friend, which when Yusuke now thought about it, it sounded ironic that Kuwabara would give him a book about that. Also was a note. It had only two words on it.

Get Well.

/Now our love is gone And your roses are dead/

Yusuke thought about his best friend's goofy smile, and strange antics until he finally collapsed closing his eyes in a pain coming from his heart. He crumpled to the floor and lay there. He vaguely noticed his long hair was gone and he was back to normal. He closed his eyes, and wondered if Kuwabara had tried to call out to him. If he had struggled in that net, praying his friends would turn around.

Yusuke let out a bitter sob, when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

Through his tears he thought he saw Kuwabara, and sat up sharply. He scrubbed his face, and shrank a little when he realized it was just Kurama and Hiei. The two sat next to him, Kurama's hand on his back. The red head opened his mouth, but Yusuke cut in, "If you say it's okay, I'll kill you."

Kurama went on, "We should have turned around."

/Your sorrow like rain comes down Your sorrow like rain comes down/

Yusuke starred at him, in a bit of disbelief. Kurama had said what he thought not two seconds ago. "Kurama..." Hiei nodded his head, "We should have looked after him, but we screwed up...we screwed up bad, and now we have to live thought it." Kurama nodded, "Emphasis on the live."

Yusuke starred at them. "Wha..."

"Don't play dumb!" Hiei snapped. "Don't pretend you haven't had a suicidal thought...we know Yusuke...We know you have had at least one...At least one dark thought creeping in your mind."

"We're not going to let you do that Yusuke." Kurama whispered.

"And what if I have had a suicidal thought? What if I intend to take my life?"

"If you expect us to sit and watch you do that, then we'll let you down. Your our friend, and Kuwabara was ours as well..."

Hiei whispered darkly, "We know him enough not to doubt that he won't come back from the grave to kick your, mine, of Kurama's aXs if we tried something like that." Hiei then muttered, "As if he could..."

Yusuke starred at them, and collapsed in the Kurama's embrace

/Cause I know I let you go And I'll always regret it/

"I snapped at him...I'll never forgive myself. I didn't say one nice thing to him on that dXmm mission! I yelled, I got annoyed with him, I even ignored him on that mission! He...HE MUST'VE DIED THINKING I HATED HIM!"

SMACK!

Yusuke was surprised when Kurama's hand smashed into his face. "No...Out of all of us you know...you know kuwabara cared for you the most. He loved you." Yusuke looked at him strangely, "Not that way!" Kurama almost signed in annoyance. Yusuke was about to say he knew what he meant, but Kurama held up his hand. "Kuwabara fought with you just as much as you fought with him...but you seem to forget the both of you were smiling when you said those things today."

"You always smile at him." Hiei added. His eyes were on the door, as if he could see through them, and see Kuwabara laying on the floor under the sheet. "Even when you two beat the hell out of each other, you smile. You smile at each other no matter the circumstance. That was probably what he thought of when he died. He thought of you. Kurama. Maybe even me." Hiei snorted. "He thought of how he'd miss us...miss you cocky attitude and grins."

"He didn't even realize how much we would miss his." Kurama whispered. "You know Yusuke...You know that's what he was thinking."

/Cause I let you down my friend But I'll never let you down again/

Yusuke stayed still, and thought of all the time he was with Kuwabara.

At school. On missions. At Genkai's. At the movies. In the park. In Kuwabara's tiny dorm that Yusuke often mocked. At a restaurant, arguing over what they should eat. In Koenma's office getting screamed up for accidently destroying the artifact they were supposed to recover.

Yusuke shook and closed his eyes. He collapsed on his side sobbing bitterly.

/Your sorrow like rain comes down In the tears that you shed/

"Oh Kuwabara..." Kurama and Hiei looked at the sobbing man, and Kurama held Yusuke in his lap. "We're here...We're here and not leaving. Everything will be okay...everything. We're not leaving you...We'll help you." Kurama's voice cracked, "We'll help your pain go away I swear!" Hiei reached over and surprisingly stroked Yusuke's hair.

This was odd for Hiei. He had never comforted someone before, and didn't want to...but Yusuke needed to know that Kurama spoke true. And Kurama had said "we." Hiei was the other part of that "we." Hiei had know idea if what he was doing was right...but Yusuke relaxed just a little.

Just the slightest bit, as he sobbed, face pressed onto Kurama's lap.

/Now our love is gone And your roses are dead/

"I'll never see him again...not until I die...and damXit knowing my dumb luck that will take too long...too dXmm long..."

Hiei stopped petting Yusuke, but moved closer, and said calmly, "I doubt that." Yusuke's red swollen eyes glanced at him. "I honestly do...that baka will come in our dreams, yell at you for moping, mock me now that I can't hurt him, and laugh at our misery, telling us to take it easy."

Kurama hugged Yusuke, "We need to go on Yusuke...need to go on..."

Yusuke went limp, "But I don't want to."

"Well that's just too dXmm bad!" Hiei snapped. "DamXit Kuwabara would be telling you to get off your asx and stop this nonsense right now! He knows your sponger then this, and so do I!"

"No he wouldn't..."

/Your sorrow like rain comes down Your sorrow like rain comes down/

"Kuwabara would have watched me, and just leave. He'd come back, wash my ace, and fix up the room, then hold me, and curse me out as he did all these things." A deranged smile crossed Yusuke's face, "And somehow...somehow everything would be better..."

"We won't let you go Yusuke!" Kurama cried sobbing now. "I won't let you sink into despair!" Kurama pressed his face onto Kuwabara's back, "I WON'T LOSE YOU TOO! I WON'T! I'LL NEVER LET YOU DOWN AGAIN!"

/Cause I know I let you go I'll always regret it/  
AS Kurama's sobs filled the air, Yusuke's own died, and he sat up, pulling Kurama up with him. He looked over at Hiei, who starred at him, his tried red eyes boring hole into Yusuke's brown ones. Yusuke realized at that moment, as Kurama clung to him, as Hiei starred at him, they needed him just as much as he needed to be comforted.

Tears finally sped down Yusuke's face one lat time, and he pulled both demons in a hug. Hiei grumbled, but did not pull away.

"You'll....You'll stay...you won't leave me now...?"

"No you idiot!" Hiei snapped, jabbing him hard in the ribs, "We're not letting you down...we're not leaving!"

/I'll never let you down again I'll never let you down again/

Hiei listened to the others sob as he was crushed in that hug. He couldn't help but feel uncomfortable as his eyes remained dry...but then again he would never cry in front of them Hiei closed his eyes and for the first time in his entire life prayed.

Kurama had told him to do it once, but Hiei ignored the advice. Kurama had told him prayer was a way to contact those that were gone. Hiei closed his eyes, and prayed, hoping it was right, 'Kuwabara...I never hated you. Don't hurt any more.'

That was all he said, and he was pretty doubtful that was a prayer at all, but he said nothing about it. He didn't care. Just didn't care. Hiei hadn't done many things that were right to Kuwabara, and he just wanted to do this thing now.

Just this one thing.

/I'll never let you down again I'll never let you down again/

Kurama listened to the sobs in the air. They were his, but sounded foreign. Kurama hadn't realized how much he cared for Kuwabara. He had never thought that he could care, could love someone so much. He loved his friends more than anything, and as said as it was, Kuwabara's demise made him realize this more than anything now.

" 'Out of pain comes a good...' " He quoted some unknown author quietly.

And the three sat there...not moving from the embrace.

/I'll never let you down again I'll never let you down again/

Decades later the world had changed. Things were different now...lives had changed, many things were different now. An old cometary sat quietly between tall sky scrapers, and a busy highway. The air was still, but the peace was interrupted.

A boy ran through the graveyard, he was about 13, soon to be 14 and he tried desperately to escape a gang that wanted to beat him up. The boy had dark hair, and pale skin, and cursed himself as he ran.

"You just have to be noble?! You just had to knock out their leader for hitting Ami didn't you?! Well look what you've done!" Suddenly he tripped over a headstone, and turned in horror, watching wicked face close in around him. Then several blurs appeared, and the large teens were screaming. The boy ducked his head, and closed his eyes.

A chill rand down his spine, and he looked down and the head stone. It was covered with fresh flowers...

Moving them aside, he scraped moss off the headstone. As soon as he saw it he realized the headstone had to be over 100 years old. "Kazuma...Ku..Kuwabara?" He whispered. He scraped more moss off, "1988-2006..." The boy's eyes widened, "He was only 18...maybe 17 or 19!" He rubbed the last bit of moss off, and found a list of rules that this Kuwabara had made for himself, The last words were, "Loving friend, and brother. May the heavens soar at your arrival."

It was then that he realized the sounds of fighting had stopped.

Slowly he turned to see a three men. Two tall, and one that was pretty short. His pale blue eyes looked at them feeling a sense of deja vu. One man turned to look at him. He had long black hair he wore in a pony tail, and brown eyes. He wore a brown trench coat, and black pants. He looked at the boy, and he trembled wondering what would happen next. The man walked to him, and picked him up, moving him off the grave. That was when The child noticed the flowers in his hand.

He watched the man place the white lilies on the grave and then a smile fell on his face. The child relaxed at that look. It was softer than the face he had a moment ago. The other two went to his side, the short one with black spiked up hair, and the red head with long one each laid down their own bundles of flowers.

The long black haired man turned to the boy, "You hurt Jaden?" Startled that this man knew his name, he shook his head no. "Go on then...stupid kid!" The man snorted eye flashing with humor. The boy stuck out his lounge, and ran away. He glanced back, the three were watching him with a funny look.

Yusuke, Kurama, and Hiei watched him go. "He has brown hair now, but I recognize those eyes..." Yusuke laughed. "Those pale blue eyes." Kurama looked at him, "Do you want to tell him...find a way to make him know he's Kuwabara." Yusuke closed his eyes, "A long time ago he died, let him have this new life."

The three smiled, Kurama patting Yusuke's back, giving him a gentle smile, as Hiei smiled at Yusuke. Yusuke walked on, not noticing the little boy that had turned to stare at them.

/I'll never let you down again/ 


End file.
